My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Randomize
