Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
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