im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
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