i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
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