I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
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