my text book just quoted the cookie monster
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
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