it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
