It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Randomize
