Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
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