Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
did i walk over a car last night?
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
Randomize
