ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize
