dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Randomize
