I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize
