I got chris browned last night
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
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