I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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