i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
They are going to name an STD after you.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Randomize
