After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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