what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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