Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
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