I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
I wish i was in the wii world.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
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