At least make sure they are 18
Why
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize
