do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
Who died my cat blue again?
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
