just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Randomize
