I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
