Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
i think my cat just said my name.
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
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