My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
The adults are the big ones right?
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Randomize
