when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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