I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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