See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
Randomize
