BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
Randomize
