i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Randomize
