You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
