just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
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