I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
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