the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize
