we're blogging at a bar
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Randomize
