Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
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