Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(516): View more from New York

check it out our google latitudes are spooning

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(818): View more from California

Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???

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(716): View more from New York

Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.

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(540): View more from Virginia

she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride

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(317): View more from Indiana

How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.

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(647): View more from Ontario

I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.

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(512): View more from Texas

She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?

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(320): View more from Minnesota

She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?

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(314): View more from Missouri

So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment

(419): View more from Ohio

Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...

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