hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
My vagina is very pro this idea
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