It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
I'm too high and old for this...
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
Randomize
