i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Randomize
