There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
last night I used snow as a chaser
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
