It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
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