just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
My dad is sitting where you rode me
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