I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
You need a sexual gate keeper
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize
