I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
