Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize
