He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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