Screwed.edu
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
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