The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
Actions speak louder than pants.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
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